This week in Mr Wiseman's literacy class we have been working on how to show instead of tell in the stories we write. The subject we wrote about was cross country. The part I chose was the the ending of cross country. This is the paragraph I wrote.
My nerves started growing as the finish line was in sight. I felt the burning heat in my chest as i raced past Miss Berry. My heart was pounding like the beat of a drum, My stomach twisted and turned. Finally i sprinted over the bright white line exhausted, The race was over.
You have done a good job in showing not telling. I could really understand how tired you were. Well done!
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